[ it's true that his lack of a heartbeat would make her sad, a reminder of how and why he lost it, but it would only be one of a number of things. like the way her attempt to connect to him, to hold onto to what she often feels is a "golden" past between the two of them, prior to kyr, through the use of the suffix ultimately fails to elicit the response that she'd hoped for.
it's hard to keep listening, to not feel a sort of... despair as he admonishes her for selfishness. and ugliness. and making her problems harder than they have to be.
she just wanted to reach him. how does she always get it so wrong?
and in fact, she starts to cry, in spite of herself, loathing herself, her selfishness, her loss and the helpless way she feels: there is nothing her fists can do to solve any of these problems.
and so she does feel ugly, and alone, and lost, and it's her fault... ]
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/4
it's hard to keep listening, to not feel a sort of... despair as he admonishes her for selfishness. and ugliness. and making her problems harder than they have to be.
she just wanted to reach him. how does she always get it so wrong?
and in fact, she starts to cry, in spite of herself, loathing herself, her selfishness, her loss and the helpless way she feels: there is nothing her fists can do to solve any of these problems.
and so she does feel ugly, and alone, and lost, and it's her fault... ]